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A. I hope you have enjoyed reading all of these Arsenal jokes as much as I have :DPlease feel free to read more about Arsenal FC from the links below Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it? Lucy Pinder, Chris Packham and David Frost all make the cut of famous Saints fans (some more famous than others), but probably the most famous must go to Craig David. Reckless Driver Your email address will not be published. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); What did the guy do when a kinky girl asked him to humiliate her?He bought her a Tottenham shirt. Tottenham have their own customized version of the phrase to bottle. To Spurs a game or have something Spursed is equivalent to bottling something. What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. Your Dark Sage Green Aesthetic Pictures images are accessible in this blog. However, the real challenge for Wenger in what could well be his last season in charge of Arsenal is to try and snap the team out of the feedback loop they have been stuck in for the second half of his reign. Here are the best Tottenham Jokes for you to share with your friends. Unleash your creativity & share you story! She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. Why did the aliens land in the Emirates?Because theres no atmosphere. "I'm going to give Mass at St. Francis church, about two miles down the road," replied the priest. Funny Arsenal Jokes Arsenal's 100% win record start to the EPL season 2022-23 was finally ended after six games, and fans are speculating about a similar pattern in previous seasons post-Wenger era. Q: What do you say to a Gunners supporter with a good looking bird on his arm? Thank you for signing up to Four Four Two. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. This is where you can join supporters clubs, follow Arsenal on social media, download exclusive wallpapers and vote for your player of the month. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is an Arsenal supporter. Ill sacrifice my life for yours.But the girl replied, No need for that, there are 2 parachutes left.How is that possible? asked Pope.The girl replied, That Arsenal FC Manager took my school bag.. "No way Richard," says his mate "of course we'll still be pals!! It sure is hard to be an Arsenal supporter. It reads: "Your basket is as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet.". to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. Why do ducks fly over Emirates Stadium upside down? He once saw Tyrone Mings at a petrol station in Bournemouth but felt far too short to ask for a photo. The former Sky Sports presenter has long had a bee in his bonnet about the Arsenal manager being outside of his technical area for long periods of matches. Arsenal's highlight of an otherwise intermittently miserable season arrived on the final round of fixtures as they somehow secured their best Premier League finish in 11 years, just weeks after discontent aimed at manager Arsene Wenger and owner Stan Kroenke spilled over into planned protest in a home game against Norwich City. Had a player called David Dicks. Pope said to the 5th passenger, an 8-year-old girl, Im an old man. About every ten years a small team wins the EPL.86 Forest95 Blackburn04 Arsenal16 Leicester. Share the funny puns and roasts in the comment section below. A: arsenel. A: A wind tunnel. Unleash your creativity & share you story! If you use a smartphone, you can also use the drawer menu of the browser you are using. A Liverpool fan liked to amuse himself by scaring every Gunners supporter he saw strutting down the street in an obnoxious Arsenal jersey. He thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?" "Funniest Arsenal FC JokesOne day Tom Thumb, Snow White, and Quasimodo are sitting around talking. Q: What is the difference between Arsenal and a cup of tea? A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. 58 Votes What is Arsenal calling their gay team, added to promote equality?The official name will be Upthearsenal but fans are expected to call them by their nickname of The rear Gunners., What is Arsenals mascot Gunnersaurus saying?I survived extinction for this fucking shit., A man stopped another man in the street and said, Can you help me? ", The reporter asks: "Who do you support, then? The primary is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. Twice. What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common? This service is provided on News Group Newspapers' Limited's Standard Terms and Conditions in accordance with our Privacy & Cookie Policy. How did Harry Kane pay his tributes to the Queen?By giving 90 minutes of silence against Sporting CP. In such page, we additionally have number of images out there. A: Intelligent Tottenham supporters. 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. Maybe there is someone uglier than me!" it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks. replied her husband. She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. But in amid the delight and schadenfreude enveloping the red half of north London, there is a. "Let's hear the good news," the president replied. The jibe is common between the two sets of fans. Which football team uses the most toilet paper?Arsenal. A: Santa Cazorla The Gunners have left supporters in shock for mocking their North London rivals over their lack of silverware through their online shop. Q: What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur fan in a suit? It said it was to weak. Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. Required fields are marked *. ", The dealer replies, "It's voice activated. Here you'll find all collections you've created before. Q: What is the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a cup of tea? The receptionist replies She immediately turns the car around and heads back to the dealer. A: Because they never have any points. Why dont they drink tea at White Hart Lane?Because all the cups are in Manchester. The Spurs fan takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the Arsenal fan. "Then," asks the teacher, "what are you?" At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. Do that, and Arsenal fans won't even have to rely on Tottenham's annual failings to put a smile on their faces. Taking to Twitter, a fan remarked: "Only Arsenal will duck a fixture against us then have the arrogance to drop a s*** trophy joke on the club website which isn't even true." Theres an article here about a man who traded his wife for an Arsenal season ticket. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? "I've good news and bad news for you this morning, sir." He writes, "Spurs fan saves friend from vicious animal. You wont get hit unless the bottles got your name on it., Thats just what Im worried about, said the fan,my names Johnny Walker.. Tottenham Hotspur Jokes Back to: Sports Jokes Follow @quickjokes Q: What do you call 100 Tottenham Hotspur supporters at the bottom of a cliff? The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. "The other man replied "It's quarter to five. A: Intelligent Arsenal supporters. You tell it want kind of music you want to listen to, and it automatically changes. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his hands. A: The bucket. Go to Arsenal's store (opens in new tab). Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Explore the lighter side of being an Arsenal fan! 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. Never too bad. Two days on and it still doesn't seem real: the dreamlike final weekend of the season, which in its sweeping drama proved once again that Tottenham will manage to unearth increasingly amazing ways, performing bizarre acts of contortion, to finish below Arsenal in the Premier League table. Q: What do I have in common with Arsenal? Why do so many housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and then come second. The third cat says "I support Arsenal, I'm not that hungry thanks", They aren't that highly rated and no one really knows much about them, but apparently they're a small club from North London. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Or why not treat yourself? The Arsenal supporter prays to God, When will Arsenal win the Premier League again? , to which God replies, In 20 years. The admirer, like the first, is visibly upset, saying, Thats a shame, Ill probably be dead by then.God then turns his attention to the last man, asking, And what of you, my son? What exactly is your question? He takes another one and jumps.The third passenger was Mikel Arteta: I am the Manager of Arsenal FC and I am one of the most creative, most intelligent, and well-remembered football players. SOL CAMPBELL has slammed Tottenham fans for the years of abuse aimed at him following his move to Arsenal. cried Wenger, "that's a big word for a Seven year old!! (Gunner who? Did you hear what Englands 1st gay professional footballer said?Its his dream to play for Arsenal.. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of whiskey didn't break. Lukas Podolski The Liverpool supporter said I want the liver Q: Why don't they drink tea at White Hart Lane? Save all royalty-free picture. What does Tottenham joining a European super league feels like? A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while! Southampton v Leicester City live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match, Shaun Wright-Phillips thinks dad Ian Wright regrets that his sons didnt play for Arsenal, Erling Haaland's agent drops HUGE hint over future transfer: 'Real Madrid is a dreamland', Brighton v West Ham live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match, Arsenal v Bournemouth live stream, match preview, team news and kick-off time for this Premier League match. Well, were having trouble getting motivated for this game. (Emery who? Q: How do you keep a Spurs fan from masterbating? "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" There's an article here about a man who traded his wife for a season ticket to Arsenal. Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Spurs fan? Laughing at Tottenham will sustain a lot of supporters during the summer, but asking Spurs to accept their place in football's grand design quietly invites Arsenal to do likewise. Q: What do I have in common with Tottenham? Its God, and he says, Welcome! The rude-abega. "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". "That's no reason," she says loudly. What should you do? It's another one of football's immutable laws; a binding force holding Arsenal in place: Never too good. When was the last time you won anything? If you find this site serviceableness, please support us by sharing this posts to your preference social media accounts like Facebook, Instagram and so on or you can also Download this blog page with the title Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans by using Ctrl + D for devices a laptop with a Windows operating system or Command + D for laptops with an Apple operating system. Godspeed. Youd never do something like that, would you?Of course not! exclaimed her husband. And he got very depressed. We Have got 7 picture about Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans images, photos, pictures, backgrounds, and more. He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. A: Frequent Flyer Miles earn points. The Spurs fan replies, "No. I waited for Two hours in the cold.". PREMIER LEAGUEArsenal charged by FA following red card complaints in defeat to Man City, DEADLINE DAYBarcelona boss Xavi warned NOT to sign Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, OPINION5 reasons it's a GOOD thing the Gunners didn't sign anyone in January, Thank you for reading 5 articles this month* Join now for unlimited access, Enjoy your first month for just 1 / $1 / 1, *Read 5 free articles per month without a subscription. A: A good start! Career Day Do you have any questions or comments? A former Arsenal academy star, Bennacer has the chance to gain some favourable points with his ex-north London side with a big performance against Tottenham in the Champions League, and. Tottenham 0-2 Arsenal: Aaron Ramsdale attacked by fan after north London derby 15 January 2023 Premier League Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale was led away from the area after an. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. How does Arsenal do in Europe?They 10-2 get knocked out. "Yes" replies Lukas "you should have my details on your computer". and a mosquito? Again she speaks to the car radio"Country Music". Q: What's the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Tottenham Hotspur tickets? Find your nearest supporters club. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were Arsenal supporters, too. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. blame the incident on Mikel Arteta's actions, mad at some referee decisions during the draw, Tottenham Hotspur fan names seven Spurs players in his north London combined XI, "We go there" - Arsenal star makes bullish North London derby claim ahead of Tottenham clash, Arsenal Suffer A Disastrous First Half In North London Derby, Arsenal star Ben White taunts Tottenham fans after being substituted in the north London derby. . The Spurs fan said: "Aren't you going to examine "down below? A. September 14, 2022, 6:44 pm "Why I'm proud to be a Liverpool supporter. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! ""The cups man! The football results are coming up on the television in the corner, Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0, reads the announcer in his normal, rather sedate, voice.Suddenly the Jack Russell dog jumps up and shouts out, Oh, no, not again.The shocked pub owner says, Thats amazing. Q: What's the difference between a fat chick and a Spurs striker? "He couldn't go to certain places for dinner or walk freely in London because of the anger of the Tottenham fans. Why are Tottenham jokes getting dumber by the day? Reckless Driver Q: Why are Arsenal jokes getting dumb and dumber? Finally, things might be starting to turn our way! Be it the home match against Leicester City in the season 2015/16 or the away match in Europa League R16 at Zagreb in season 2020/21, Spurs find a way to cheer their rival fans.In the current season, Tottenhams last-minute failure against Sporting Lisbon extended Antonio Contes dreadful champions league record. A: The bucket. 49 Votes Why did Jesus join Arsenal?He wanted to join a team where everyone is called Gabriel. One day there was 3 girls one supported Leeds United and wore blue knickers, , to which God replied, In ten years. The disappointed admirer sulks away, exclaiming, Thats a shame; Ill probably be dead by then.The Arsenal fan and his walking cane push the first fan to the side as he sulks. He looked at the others and asked, "Who the hell is Martin Keown? Their club had been formed in 1886 in Woolwich and we had first played them in 1887, leading 2-1 when the game was abandoned by the referee because of poor light. ", It was lean pickings one winter but eventually they managed to catch a mouse and are discussing how they will divide it up. A tourist is in North London one Saturday and he decides he would very much like to go to a football match, so he asks a man in the street if there are any local matches being played that afternoon. "Hate Jokes ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan in a suit ? Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. The former Arsenal striker appeared to mock Tottenham during a punditry appearance on French television. The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. Lukas Podolski walks into a sperm donor bank in London What are the three people you can never advise? "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", A booming voice welcomes them as they walk through the doors. Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. The Arsenal fan asks, "Aren't you having any?". "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. And the Spurs fan was thinking: 'This is great. Arsenal JokesA Spurs fan and an Arsenal fan get into a car accident, and it's a bad one. He takes off his clothes for other men, and if they pay him enough money, he goes into the alley and performs sexual acts on them.' After 25 . ''Yes - but I couldn't get anyway near it for the Arsenal supporters! As the goals flew in for Arsenal at Emirates Stadium in their 4-0 win against Aston Villa, in Newcastle the opposite was being inflicted on Tottenham as they somehow slumped to a 5-1 deficit against a relegated team with 10 men. What does a Spurs fan do after he sees his team win a trophy?Turns off the Xbox. The Gunners raced to a two-goal lead in the first half of the north London derby as they t Johnny comes to the front of the class. A: People would pass up a pair of Spurs tickets. A: A wind tunnel. Select it and click on the button to choose it. Q: Why do Tottenham fans suck at geometry? What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Spurs strikers?Clinton can score. Some Tottenham fans took to social media to mock their North London rivals after Arsenal's loss to Aston Villa on Monday meant that they will finish below Spurs again this year. If you're searching for Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans topic, you have visit the ideal page. For example [my story] would show as my story on the Web page containing your story.TIP: Since most people scan Web pages, include your best thoughts in your first paragraph. And Arsenal have poked fun at Antonio Conte's side by displaying a cheeky message on their official store. Q: What's the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes? 0 Comments. Why cant Tottenham open up a restaurant?Because they have no silverware. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days.". They're both obsessed with Tottenham. The Arsenal fan said I'm not hungry. Your email address will not be published. What do you say to a Spurs fan with a good-looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo. "Arsenal Story JokesA woman buys a car in London. I know it's bad, but everyone deserves a good arsenal of dad jokes. "The Sun", "Sun", "Sun Online" are registered trademarks or trade names of News Group Newspapers Limited. A: Every fall they go into hibernation. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. He takes off his clothes for other men, and if they pay him enough money, he goes into the alley and performs sexual acts on them.' It is tempting to reach for metaphysical explanations after an inexplicable chain of events like this. Martin Odegaard's long range shot nine minutes before halftime pretty much ended the match as a contest, even if Spurs did improve in the second half. I'll give you a lift!" AN Arsenal fan has trolled Tottenham by wearing a Gunners shirt in the home end during the North London derby. What do you tell your girlfriend who needs space?To check Arsenals trophy cabinet. A young team lost their hope and then lost their heads and focus completely. Whats the problem with Martin degaard?Odegaard wouldnt shoot Hitler if he had a gun. (You can preview and edit on the next page), Upload 1-4 Pictures or Graphics (optional). She asks Mary why she is a Liverpool supporter.
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